Posted in 7 Quick Takes

7 Quick Takes Friday

1. Wonder of wonders, miracle of miracles (name that movie!), we got a TAX RETURN! Those of you who are self-employed know how weird this is. I was completely not expecting it and when the CPA told me about it I actually didn’t believe him. And he’s a Dave Ramsey ELP! The money hit our checking account the same day the check from our PA state taxes got processed, so that was rather handy, don’t you agree?? 🙂

2. Jim is working a contract right now, which I love. However, they had an audit this week and he was working an average of 10-12 hour days until yesterday. While I can handle the single parenting, boy, did I miss him! My love languages are quality time and physical touch, neither of which got spoken this week. 😦

3. As I’m typing, the dog is going insane about the trash men. Anyone have ANY SUGGESTIONS AT ALL about how to stop a dog from barking ALL FREAKING DAY LONG AT ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING that drives by our house (let alone…shudder…dares to stop at our house!)??? Let me add this to the 1000 reasons why cats are better than dogs.

4. The only things so far that I’ve found dogs are better than cats are: they lick up/eat things that you spill and make you feel safer at night when your husband is away. Other than that, yeah, cats are just better.

5. I have a pile of books (literally!) from both my mother and mother in law that I am finally getting around to read. So far I’ve had my socks completely knocked off by the first of two books by Susan Elia MacNeal. Mr. Churchill’s Secretary is AMAZING. It takes place in England in 1940–right before America joined the war. It’s got the historical aspect–VERY well researched–as well as the mystery aspect. Although I’m not typically a mystery person, this one definitely kept me guessing and wondering and guessing some more. Well worth the read!

6. 6 WEEKS LEFT OF SCHOOL!! I am so unbelievably ready for school and the schedule and the early mornings to be finished. We have a fairly packed summer already, but nothing that requires 5:30 alarms. Thank goodness!

7. I’m going to bake today. Sugar Dusted Apple Bundt Cake.  It was an ad in a magazine. The cake looked so good and I had everything except the canned apples (which I then bought) that I’m actually going to bake. From scratch. Which, is you know me at all by now, you know that just doesn’t happen. At all. Ever. I expect massive thanks and bowing when I serve it, and will let everyone in the family know beforehand. 😀

Have a wonderful weekend, People.

Posted in Christian, God, Me

Co-Inky-Dink

So, as I said last time I’m not one to see a demon behind every struggle, although I definitely believe that they are behind some. Conversely, I don’t see God in every little “coincidence”, although I definitely believe He is in some of them.

So….The falling-apart-day had one thing in it that I didn’t know about until the following day after I posted. While I was out grabbing lunch at a local farmer’s market store, I checked out and saw that they had Our Daily Bread by the check out counter (oh, yeah, they are Christian owned and operated). So, on a whim, I grabbed one and put it in the bag. Forgot about it because I just took the food out and ate it and left the bag on the counter (which I am trying to grow out of!)

So, Thursday I’m straightening up, which included the counter. Find the Daily Bread and put it on the living room coffee table for later perusing.  When I sat down to start reading it, I noticed it was the June,July,August issue. Now, the OCD part of me would normally be totally bugged by that, but I needed to do SOMETHING, so I ignored it and just opened to the first page. The passage was John 10:7-14, which, COINCIDENTALLY, contains the verse “I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” that I spoke about two posts ago.

Thank you, God, for that little pat on the head. I needed it. I’m searching and You really me to keep at it, huh?.

Posted in Christian, God, Me

Yesterday…All My Troubles Weren’t Far Away

So, if you read yesterday’s post, you know a little bit about where I am right now. After I pressed publish I prayed that God would help me. That He would help me to find Him.

And then…WHOA…the day fell apart.

I’m not one to see the work of the devil in everything. I don’t see demons behind every door. But I had a CRUMMY, LOUSY, AWFUL, ROTTEN day yesterday. I tried to go out to lunch to break up the “stuck at home” feeling and ended up crying in the parking lot. Crying in the parking lot, for heaven’s sake! For NO DISCERNIBLE REASON.

It kind of freaked me out. I wasn’t ovulating (and therefore crazy and short tempered). Nothing was different that I could tell. But I was so, so sad and out of sorts. So depressed and couldn’t hardly stand to be with myself.

After I pressed publish.

Even I’m not going to ignore that coincidence.

I’m hoping (and praying) for a better day today.

Posted in Bible Study, Christian, Church, Me

Relationship with a Spirit

You want real? Really Real? Here it is.

I grew up in the church. Went from the moment of conception onward. Sunday school, baptism, church choir, etc. Changed churches at 17 to worship with my friends (although stayed Baptist). Did the Sunday school thing some more, the youth group thing, and finally met God. Turned my life over to him. Don’t know if it was getting saved or rededication. I had always believed, but it had never made a difference. Grew. Grew like Crazy. Started dating Jim and changed churches to worship in his church. Non-denominational. Grew some more. Got married and started to try to get pregnant. After a lot of help, finally got pregnant. Had four children at 25 weeks, lost one, had one be blind and not eat, had two on oxygen, had one with a colostomy.

This was NOT THE PLAN. Life wasn’t perfect. God let us down. We didn’t get it–or Him–and turned away. Stopped going to church, stopped growing, stopped following, everything. Life was about survival.

2005, January. We knew, for whatever reason, that the kids should be in church. We went to a few different ones, but ended up at a lovely, nurturing sweet church. I sat in that pew, week after week, angry or just indifferent. God kept knocking. Finally made the decision of will, that regardless of how I felt, I believed God was a good God. I would set aside my feelings and follow Him again. I started praying, started not being so angry, started following.

2013. April. There is no closeness. There is no growth. There is a desire, oh, yes, a desire. But a complete lack of how to get that closeness. Bible study, when I try, is dryer than the Sahara. It’s just reading words on a page–filling in blanks in a book. The pastor on Sunday talked about how Jesus was the Way, the Truth and the Life. The life part was supposed to be abundant. Mine’s not. I haven’t admitted that openly, but there it is. I want it to be. Honestly I do. And I feel like, by this point in my life I should know how to do it, like if I follow the bullet points of pray, read my bible, listen to Christian music, then I’ll get there.

I miss God. I miss that joy, that growth, that abundance of a depth of relationship with God. Any suggestions, people?

Posted in Change, Church, Me

It’s Always Good to Make New Friends

(for those who don’t get it, that’s a reference to Disney’s Enchanted)

So….we’ve visited a new church for three weeks now. The original plan was to visit 3, maybe 4 churches and then settle down in one of them. But, as Jim put it:

1. This church is really (as in really, really, really close. Like 2 minutes maybe if I drive slowly)

2. The kids like the youth program/kids program.

3. The sermons are good.

4 The music is good (which, coming from where we came from, is actually pretty important)

5. We met two couples that we had previously attended church with two churches ago. Like, before kids. FRIENDS!

So, why, exactly, would we go visit any more churches?

So we’re not. We are going to stick with this one for the time being.

I was thinking about this fact this morning. Outside of three families (the two mentioned above and another one from our neighborhood), I really don’t know anyone there. They don’t know me.  They don’t know us. SO WEIRD!

We’d been at our previous church for 8 years. And the one before that, well, Jim was a teenager in, we dated there, got married there and were young married there. (part of the problem, as we weren’t allowed to grow up and be adults in the adults’ heads, but that’s water under the bridge by now!).

Now we are in our mid-40’s–FULLY GROWN UP, thankyouverymuch, with four kids. Jim’s been an elder, I’ve been a deacon, we’ve both been worship leaders. We’re coming into this church very, VERY differently from where we came into our previous church–mid-30’s, four very little ones, very disillusioned with God and only there because we knew the kids needed church. Our old church nurtured and loved us back to God. Now, obviously, things changed and we left and there’s definitely some hurt there. But it was also something I was ready to do. I wish they hadn’t made the decision they made, but it certainly made leaving a LOT easier.

So, all that said, it’s just interesting to me that I’m going to be meeting and making new friends with people who will know me as I am and where I am NOW. They won’t see that person I was 10 years ago. Well, sure, I’ll talk about it. But I’m in such a different place than I was, am a different person than I was. It’s just something that struck me.