Posted in Addiction, Kids, Snow

A Tuesday Snow

I have two at home and two in 1/2 day of school. Catie is home sick with strep and Ethan we opted to keep home given the snow we are currently getting and the forecast. His school bus ride is 1 1/2 hours long in GOOD weather, so we chose safety over education. I hate making that choice at 6:30 in the morning, but it frequently has to happen. Is he sick enough to stay home? Should we send him and hope for the best? Only once have I gone in to Philly to pick him up and I really REALLY don’t want to do that again. Picking up from our local elementary school–3 whole miles away–is much easier.

So on this not-so-quiet Tuesday, with the snow gently falling and Arthur on in the playroom, my life will look a little different than I planned. With children at home I never seem to get as much done. Quiet times are much harder to focus on, although I WILL HAVE ONE TODAY. With the doctor, the pharmacy and grocery shopping I forgot to yesterday and felt the lack.

I was reading the Run a muck this morning. Challenging post. Hard to read post. Sad post. I, too, have put myself and my struggles out there for you all to read. In the end I’m glad. Hiding sin gives it power and I don’t want to grace it with anything more than mere existence. I have twinges now and then, but have been “good” with it for awhile now. Sobriety, which is what we call it even if it’s not alcohol, is definitely hard fought over. The longer you go forward in it, the more you want to continue, so as not to mess up your record. Sobriety becomes its own entity to be cherished and coddled, cared for and honored. But it also allows for distance between you and how you felt when you fell. It’s a humbling, shaming, horrible feeling. And that can make for some laziness instead of vigilance. Which just puts you back down in the pit again.

So, on this snowy Tuesday, with my taxes almost done (just a final run through), two kids home and lots of laundry on my list, God is at the top of the To Do List.

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