Poor Catie! I promise that I never forget that I have her or that she gets eclipsed by the other three!
Catie was conceived when the triplets were 10 months old. Yes, we somehow managed to have “special alone time”. I had asked Jim to get the big V done, but he kept saying “It’s too soon!” I think he was still worried about losing another baby. In retrospect I wouldn’t change a thing, but I WAS NOT a HAPPY CAMPER that day I FIGURED IT OUT!
In between having the kids and conceiving Catie, I was actually somewhat ‘regular’ for the first time in my life. I had cycles every other month. I remember mentioning that we needed to “use something” and then got caught up in things and forgot. 10 days later I felt different. (both times I knew 10 days later!). I thought I was being silly, but bought a home pregnancy test anyway. on Day 14 I took the test at 6AM, while the night nurse was downstairs taking care of the other, while my mother slept in the then-spare room, while Jim was at work on an early day. Two blue lines and I scream “NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!” I’m so excited, you see, at the idea of adding another baby!!
I grab the phone and call my beloved husband. Not even a hello for him “I’m pregnant” I say in a “There will be no joy in my life ever again” voice.
“Wha….wha…huh…WHAT?” He managed to get out.
“And it’s YOUR FAULT!” He heard this frequently.
I call my sister and her husband. I show the nurse. I wake my mother, who’s response “OH TINA!!” made me feel like a knocked-up 16 year old.
I spend the next 37 weeks in various states of denial, anger, exhaustion, being upset, and wondering WHAT in the World God is doing bring a BABY into this CHAOS?!
The morning of March 13, 2003, Jim and I were up and out the door at 4:30 to get to the hospital by 5 for my scheduled c-section at 8. On the way down I am having Braxton Hicks. I think. They start getting regular, though and I end up being in labor. Thank goodness for the spinal! And for a good anesthesiologist, who not only didn’t have skeevy long nails like the last one (a man!), but didn’t give me too much and make it difficult for me to breathe. A nurse was by my head, gently keeping her hand on my forehead and making sure I was ok. Jim didn’t have to do it like last time. He got to really watch the birth and tape it so I can watch later.
For nine months I was dreading this moment, but the INSTANT they pulled her out–all 8 lbs 3 oz of her–I fell in love. Not even her whole body, just her head was enough to change my emotions immediately. Instantaneous Mother Love. She was healthy, crying and doing great. About an hour later I got to try nursing, which she loved and was great at.
Three days later we were home and working out this “having four kids” thing. The kids loved their new baby sister. Almost 5 years later I can’t imagine life without her. She’s such a blessing!