Balance

I’ve been working for 2 1/2 weeks now. I still haven’t figured out how to balance everything–getting ready for work, reminding the kids to get ready, making dinner, doing laundry, finding time for God….that last one has definitely gone completely by the wayside. I originally thought “oh, I’ll have a quiet time at lunch”, but I have ended up only taking  15 minute lunch. When I come home, He’s the last thing on my mind until I go to bed and think “oh, rats, I meant to spend time with You!”. How do I do this? I have a little less than two months left of working and don’t want to ignore God the whole time!

When Other Blogs Touch You

If you are reading this, you’ve either found me through a search of some kind, or you are a “regular” follower. (that word is in quotations because, really, I’ve become somewhat lax in posting). If you are the latter, most likely you are like me….you’ve found several blogs that you read and follow because you like what the author has to say. My “blogroll” is currently 17 blogs long. I go to my “bookmarks” tab at the top, click on it and scroll to “bookmarks toolbar” and then go to the right. Each of those 17 blogs is there. If something new has been posted (and I check at least once per day), I read it. Sometimes I smile and that’s it. Sometimes I cry and pray.

Sometimes, good sometimes, I’m prompted to change.

Beauty in the Mundane is a wonderful blog. Today it was a little more. “God Goggles” was the title of the post–seeing things God’s way and doing what He would have us do was the point of it. I read it and was reminded how little I ask God for what He wants my day to look like. I’m great at making lists. Don’t get me wrong, doing the laundry and taking out the trash are all good and necessary. They are a part of my job as a homemaker. But seeing my children through God’s eyes, now, that’s not on any list I’ve ever made. I’ve already prayed for it this morning and want to keep that at the forefront of my mind today, (plus look for opportunities to interact with other people besides my children.)

I encourage you to read the post and give it some thought.

Blessing

My calendar is the end-all-be-all for me. If it isn’t on the calendar, it doesn’t get remembered. Period. Apparently I’m not the only one!

Over Christmas we were supposed to have a playdate with “Aunt Judy” and her kids. They were completely sick, so it got rescheduled for today. Only, Judy didn’t write it down. I called yesterday to confirm (smart me!) and she was like Huh? She had too much schoolwork to do. Ok, no big deal, we’ll hang out at home instead. Except not.

Our church received a call from a woman who had lost her job back in December and they needed food. I called last night and got more information and promised–barring an actively vomiting child–that I could come today with food from the food bank. Her response? She cried.

This morning I grocery shopped for our family, got kids fed and showered and just did normal things. This afternoon, however, I got to experience the complete HIGH of being used by God. What a blessing!

1. Wawa for a gas gift card

2. Food pantry to fill up on non-perishables for mom, dad and 3 boys.

3. Community Outreach member’s house for some frozen meat.

4. Gap Family Center for information pamphlets on Lancaster County’s food bank and angel food ministry. She’s actually not served by our outreach, but we are authorized to give out food whenever necessary.

5. To her house, where the kids and I stayed for the better part of two hours.  We brought in the food, talked, hugged, visited, commiserated, etc.

You know how, sometimes when you meet someone, there is just an instant connection? She and I had it. She’s a few years younger than me, has a 9 year old boy, 8 year old boy and a 2 year old boy. My kids had so much fun playing!

When I gave her the gas card, she cried and hugged me again.

While I may panic here and there about money while Jim is out of work, I do know in the back of my mind that we have a 401k that we can access. Yes, there is 20% tax and a 10% penalty to do it, but it’s there. My parents are there if we need them. I don’t WANT to go that route, but it’s there.

On the way home, I called Judy to thank her for forgetting and being too busy to get together. God obviously had WAY more important plans for my day than hanging out!

Starting Off the Year with a Roll

Around my middle, that is.

I have officially gained  back every SINGLE POUND I lost over the last two years.  ::stamping my feet in a childish tantrum::  (does online stamping count as exercise?)

Bennett’s karate place has a small gym attached to it. I just left a message with them asking about the cost–although Jim is still not working we just got some Christmas money. Some of that is for the general fund, but some is for personal use. And losing weight and getting in shape is something I actually want to pursue this year.

Julie at Pragmatic Compendium has been doing a “Word for the Year” for a few years now. I’ve been letting it percolate for a week or so now and think I want to do it a little differently. I want to do a word a month for now. There are a few things I want to work on this year, none of which can be encompassed by a single word. So this month, my word is:  Identity

Yesterday Pastor Nate preached on it–how we don’t act on the fact of our identity in God (e.g. I am God’s daughter, God’s princess). If we REALLY believed in who we were in God, we would be completely different.

That spoke to me–especially in light of my recovery. I don’t consciously walk around thinking “I’m an addict”, but my actions often (especially when I give in to it) say that. If I am God’s daughter, it’s my job to reflect that, in thought, deed, recovery, parenting, relationships, service–you name it.

Also percolating in my brain is my reasons behind being involved both at church and at the community outreach–am I doing them because it’s “what good Christians do”? Or because it’s where my heart is? Or because I feel like God is calling me to them? Or…or….or….

I want to keep doing both, but for the RIGHT reasons.

So, to sign off, Happy New Year to you, my faithful readers. Thanks for stopping by, and I hope to see more of you as the year goes on.

What They See

When we started going to our church 5 1/2 years ago, Jim and I were really struggling with God. We believed in Him–that never stopped–but didn’t really want to have much to do with Him. He had LET US DOWN. One of our children was dead, one was blind and on a feeding tube, one had bowel issues….the list went on and on. We were Christians and had prayed with our whole hearts for these babies and GOD SAID NO.

How dare He???

5 1/2 years later, Jim is an elder and the worship leader at our church. I’m a deacon, a worship leader and the de facto secretary. Things are, well, rather different! In a very good way. We were refined by fire, if I can use a little “christianese”.

Our church has just hired a new pastor. He and his wife and two little ones just moved up from Texas to lead our little flock. (And I’m not kidding about little!) These two very nice people do not know us. We do not know them. We can and will tell them about our lives and our journey to the present, but they will only get to know the people that we are now–the leaders.

It’s kind of weird.

Ok, WHO PRAYED??

One of my regular bloggers linked to this blog today, which was a DIRECT answer to yesterday’s post.

I am blown away at how timely the message is to me. And unable to deny that God directly had a hand in it.

Wow. Just wow.

Faith Without Works is…

not worth a whole lot, according to James.

Have you ever had God continually put something in front of you–in all different forms–to try and get His message across? Yeah, that’s been happening a lot to me lately. Specifically, how does my being a Christian actually affect the world?

From where I stand (and apparently, God since He’s poking me), not a whole lot. I’m raising my children in a godly home. That’s important. Very important, and I’m not denigrating that in any way. But I can do that and have an impact on my world, as well. I have 2 months left until the kids are out of school. I’m working a few days/week right now and the other days do have things in them, but nothing that can’t be moved around.

So as of tonight, I’m going to start looking around at where I can make an impact. Because otherwise, well, what’s the point?

7 Quick Takes Friday?

No. It’s Good Friday. The day we celebrate the fact that Jesus died on the cross for us. 7 Quick Takes Friday is just a tad bit shallow for that.

Thank you, Jesus, for going through what you did to give me (and everyone else!) the chance to spend eternity with you.

Bible Study

I had to go and pick up bulletins for our church today over in Ephrata (that’s Ef-rah-ta for you non-PA people!). There’s a good-size Christian bookstore/homeschooling/scrapbooking/whatever you might be looking for kind of store called Ken’s Educational Joys. Not exactly a terrific name, but whatever. While there, I found the next book I’m going to use for my personal bible study.

Remember this post? About wanting to have a gentle spirit, be a Proverbs 31 woman, etc?

Here’s what I’m going to study! Appropriate, don’t you think???

I’m excited. I did her study on James last year and liked it. It was a little on the “fill in the blank” side, but definitely covered what the passages were about and made me think. Hoping to see a difference from beginning to end.

I’m also going to try (emphasis on TRY, people!) to read through my new 1 Year NIV Chronological bible. I’m not going to try to do it in a year (I’m already 7 days behind for goodness sake!) but love the idea of reading through in the correct order to get a better lay of the land (what was going on that caused David to write a certain Psalm etc).

It’s going to be a fun year with God!

On Obedience

When God says something it’s not a conversation on our end. Or, at least, it shouldn’t be. “Forgive” says He. “Do I have to?” whines me.

I never thought I had a problem with forgiveness. I’ve been hurt over the years but always managed to get past it.

But this time I’m struggling. Family Drama that has not been talked about here, in respect for the perpetrators as well as for the victims, has rendered me seemingly unable to comply with God’s simple one word command. “Forgive” says He. “But God!” whines me.

The Bible is fairly clear on this subject. If we don’t forgive others we are in clear disobedience. Even if they don’t ask, we are required to do it.

Yet when I think of calling this person my stomach gets into knots. When I think of NOT calling this person my stomach gets into knots as well. And the longer I put it off the harder it’s becoming. This person was mean. Plain and simple. Mean in such a way that I haven’t experience since high school–20 some odd years ago. And I keep coming up against the immovable wall of God’s command. “Forgive” says He.